the sacred path of the warrior

Imbolc chant:

The Sun is coming behind the storm,

And here my home is safe and warm.

Good spirits that love us come inside.

Warm yourselves at my fireside.

our storms here are metaphorical.

some of you may have seen on the news that we had a shooting wednesday at the elementary school in placerville.

beloved principal and family man Mr. Sam Lacara was shot and killed by the janitor right in the middle of a lovely public school morning.  a wonderfully sweet man, he was my own teacher two decades ago when i first moved to this town. he was the hot p.e. teacher that all the girls had crushes on.

 and later he has known each one of my brothers who followed through the school system; their hearts are broken.

all this has left me feeling first empty and sad, then feisty.

enough talk of, "what's become of our town"...it's time to be active, to actively puruse peace and love.

i want to be a warrior, of the ancient mystical kind.

i remembered addie reading this book years ago, and i had a tiny gem of its message lodged in me.

it's a broken-spined miniature copy but i found it amongst my many bookshelves and took it outside in the sun and began to read. i sat eating my grapefruit, tasting each tiny burst on my tongue and feeling oh-so-glad to be alive and to know the goodness of the sun, the taste of citrus, the joy of books and words.

that is exactly what the shambhala warrior's way is about: knowing and trusting goodness.

being fearless in your heart, being tender; being open to the genuine heart of sadness.

it is a different kind of "warrior" than our current understanding of the word implies.

and i am growing my reindeer horns and ready for fearlessness.

i am going to meditate every day.

i am wearing my bullet crystal from sadie for fierceness and clarity.

feathers and dreamcatchers from milla for wisdom and consciousness.

this old blouse that addie gave me for connection to archetypal characters.

that night we all went out and got drunk and talked up a storm.

being together is good, and we wondered what we can do to make our town good again, and we laughed, and talked some more, and changed the subject, and changed back and talked about everything we love and laughed more. and becky and jorden said good-bye with extra care because it might be the last time they see us without their new babe in arms!

the next two days i've spent alone with my cozy husband: reading, writing, being quiet, paying attention to what is alive and good.

half jokingly, i wear this militaryesque jacket and cap to escort me down my warrior path.

i wore it out wednesday night and my friends giggled at me but said it looked cute...so i'm goin with it!

my silly uniform of fearlessness and bravery in which i face the world that holds such imbalance.

today i paired them with a black lace skirt and pink leggings to show my softness too.

my favorite part about the way of the warrior is the humor, the "light touch" as Chogyam Trungpa calls it:

"A genuine sense of humor is having a light touch: not beating reality into the ground but appreciating reality with a light touch."

meanwhile i wait out this dark stormy time (does anyone know what is going on cosmologically?)

 with patience and an open heart,

because the sun is still shining here and i get to snuggle with my husband and cats. 

that's how i know life is good, so good, and my heart is glad to share it with all of you.

my warrior digs:

jaunty black cap: thrifted at snowline hospice, $3.50

army overshirt: thrifted by darin i think

fox pin: found in my junk drawer this morning

mystic green blouse: given to me by addie years ago because she had bad memories in it

black lace skirt: thrifted at snowline hospice, $3.00

earrings: gift from milla

bullet necklace: giveaway prize from sadie

turquoise and shell necklace: thrifted long ago

rose leggings: thrifted, $1

black boots: old ones from charlotte russe, falling apart