one or two stories about my brother mikie

my brother mikie came to town for a few days. when i saw him i started crying.....


i had been thinking about the past. the glorious, madcap, wild adventures of my early twenties. my little brother mikie was a senior in high school and was the star of the spring musical, Godspell. yep, he was jesus.

here's a polaroid from closing night, that's mikie in the striped pants. there are many people i love in this picture.

during that time i became close friends with some of the other godspell kids: jamie, rebecca, mary, and in turn my circle of friendship was blossoming into what it is now. we basically all fell in love with each other. i've written a little about that time when i told the story of my little yellow house.

we hung out all the time that summer. once a large group of us hiked to some natural waterslides at a place we call Quintette. it was a wonderful day but on the way back i got melancholy. i can't exactly remember why, but it had to do with having some regrets and feeling stupid about some things i'd done. getting too drunk, acting the fool, embarrassing myself, whatnot. i'd gone to a dark place earlier that year, right after the break up with a longterm boyfriend. in any case, i was walking with my brother mikie talking about this, and he sang to me a song from godspell: you are the light of the world. he sang me the whole thing but i remember this part best:
"so let your light so shine among men,
let your light so shine.
so that they might know some kindness again.
we all need help to feel fine (let's have some wine!)"

he told me that i was indeed a light in the world, and i believed him. there was so much love surrounding us, and also playfulness and youth and some sweet magic of time and the moon.

i cried thinking about this the other day. because i'm hormonal and i'm a mom now and i know more deeply that hard-earned and perfect light inside each of us.

i might add: it's mikie who is truly a light in the world. it sounds cheesy, but he really is. he has a wild heart; he's playful and lively and loud. but also he's kind and nostalgic and a worrywart. added bonus: he's super smart. and super handsome. 

just say his name out loud: MIKIE. it's fun.


i also thought about the time we hiked mount timpanogos, how he stayed with me toward the top, toward dawn. how we crossed that steep field of shale and he was right there with me, telling me to focus on just one step at a time. i told that whole story  here as well.

how sweet he is, how he worries for my dad when we go camping or hiking together, how he always champions the underdog, the one who needs a little help or encouragement.

when i saw him on wednesday i told him the stories and told him i appreciate him for this; for having so much energy that he freely gives it away when someone needs a boost. i hugged him and cried at breakfast and his beautiful wonderful girlfriend marisa, who understands it all and has a marvelous similarity to mikie in most ways, had tears in her eyes too. it was just one of those moments.



i am blessed beyond belief with this amazing family of mine. sometimes i pinch myself and wonder how i got so lucky with these two precious baby girls. then i remember i was always so in love with family, my heart was right there all along, and somehow this just all makes sense. it's just all growing outward and on, expanding, like light in the world.


for another mikie story, go here.

Comments

Teeny said…
Heather, that is so beautiful. So in love with family....what a perfectly said post. He is right about your light...and it must be genetic and maybe something that just surrounds you lady, because it seems to radiate from all of your family and friend photos too. xo
AdieSpringB said…
oh honey you've put tears in my eye too. That magical magical summer of 2000. Godspell. Man what a year and what a yellow house. What a family. I swear to god I wish I was closer. Oh well, now that I don't have the flu from Satan maybe I will come see you like THRICE this week.

That cast. Looking at that photo. SO MANY LOVES!!! Mary, Jamie, Rebecca, Lauren, Charlene, Paul, Mikie the list goes on and on!!! What a performance geez it was so great I HAVE GOT TO GO SEE THIS ONE NOW. I cannot believe FOURTEEN WHOLE YEARS HAVE GONE BY. It seems like yesterday. THe year 2000 stuck in my heart, me and you, all the fun the new friends, the solemn swear-by girl friendships forever, the summer that lay ahead the Greyhound bus the New York City, your burned down house. Oh honey what a life I sure hope that in some future day we can live side by side with our young uns running around like little wild chickens and some champagne in our thermoses.

And Mikie. Yes what a vivacious good life, what a brother, what a party, how much animation to add to the situation whenever he may be in the room. I think I need to call him right now. I miss our family all being together. It makes me know for sure, especially now, that being together matters more than anything else. I have to go to Big Sur. How could I ever OPT OUT of a Beatty family rendezvous??? How could I ever thank god enough for landing me in this expressive, talkative, wonderful magical, believe in magic, believe in nature, believe in the reasons for it all family??? I am so grateful for that one thing alone that all other gratitudes tail behind besides the gratitude for life itself. My family and all of our hope and sadness, greatness and spontaneity and gladness. We are the superstars to me. We are the people we wish to meet. We are living it and we are it.
Matt Beatty said…
Adie, it's like Isaac Brock says, "we're the people that we wanted to know, and we're the places that we wanted to go"

Heather: what a great honor to Mikie. Magic Mike. greatest uncle Mikie. love him so--I love that we'll always have Beatty-fam prestidigitation and amazement, more where that came from. perpetual summertime with us!
Rachel Weaver said…
This is all so beautiful, though right now I'm still sort of shaken up about your river story to put my thoughts into words.

Siblings have always been so important to me that I rushed to have a second baby because I couldn't bear to think my first would not get to grow up with family by her side.

Your family is special. It shines.
dolly anna said…
this is so sweet! i feel like mikie is the beatty i have spent the least amount of time with. the old photos are fun, what a trip to be able to see him in those stripey pants and singing his songs. it seems he holds his own special place in your family, part of the colorful and tightly woven tapestry of beatty!

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